October 2011
weight loss to date:82 lbs in 9 1/2 months
Well, things are going better now that I got back on an eating plan. I went back to writing down all of my calories to better track it and lost 4 lbs the first week. I am getting so close to "one-derland" and losing 100 lbs total. Now I think I need to start dealing with some of the emotional stuff that comes along so I can kick some butt.
I have really been struggling to learn to love myself for who I am and not always second guess myself. I get frustrated when I can't do something right the first time, I don't know if I will ever look in the mirror and see anything but the heavy girl I was, I always think people are going to hate me if I say/do the wrong thing. I know we all have these things too, but I just can't seem to let myself enjoy this new life I have. I want to know that I worked hard and love myself for who I am. Oh well. I know it will come with time. So, until I can see myself the way God sees me, I will pray and know that He loves me just the way I am!
That's all for now. Only 5 lbs to "one-derland"!!! So, off to work out I go!!
Carla! You are so amazing! Though your amazing transformation has taken time, it will also take time for you to adjust to your "new" self! Keep up the good work and in time you'll adjust to the "new" you and just keep enjoying all things that you continue to enjoy! Zumba, running and spending time with your hubby! Keep up the good work!
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